Saturday, February 11, 2012


Oh, hello there. Long time no talk. Well, today I have a reason to write. This past Tuesday, I was scheduled for my very last Herceptin treatment. Both of my parents canceled their days to come and help out. My dad stayed home with the girls and Ian and Mom came with me to the hospital.

I had been feeling kind of sick for the last few weeks, and with the combination of my nausea and the absence of my monthly friend, Dr song ordered a lot of blood work for me to do beforehand since my port would already be accessed and this is how they get blood these days. After getting a bed and getting all hooked up, the nurse asked me how I'd been feeling and after I told her my strange symptoms (I've been so insanely tired, very nauseous, having car sickness, really bad pain where the boob used to be, crazy hot flashes, weird fingertips and just an all around feeling of crappiness), she called down to ask Dr. Song what we could do about my meds and to let her know I'd been under the weather. Well what do you know, Dr Song decides I can't be treated because she's just sure I'm pregnant - which A) would be so insanely dangerous for me given that I tested positive for all 3 hormone receptors and B) no way lady, I've peed on 40 tests and they all came back negative.
After the nurse reports that half of the message back, she continues by saying, "So she isn't sure if she's going to send you to palliative care yet --" and then the phone rings, so nursey goes to the phone!!! WHAT!?!?! I thought I WASN'T dying anymore??? So after nearly pooed the bed, she came back and finished explaining that the people in palliative care specialize in pain relief and since after almost a year, I'm still in so much pain from surgery and radiation, maybe they could help me out.

I was SO angry that they weren't treating me. I have a job now, I can't just take days off like it's nothing. And on top of that, we were having a party at Red Lobster at dinner time to celebrate the end of this shitty shitty road (sorry Grandpa). I had been so excited for Tuesday to come so I could wrap it up, and now she just threw it away. So what did I do? I grabbed me a sanitary cup, got detached from the bag of salene, told the nurse to hold my bed and boots, and marched downstairs and into module A where Dr Song works. The receptionist thought I was insane and hated my stinkin guts, but I wasn't backing down and I had a little pee filled cup in my hand, demanding that somebody test it so I can get this shit over with so that I'd never have to see the chemo floor again. BYEAH!

I'll skip the next few hours of being bounced back and fourth to nurses and receptionists and different modules that they all sent me to. Basically I finally won over a nurse and she went for the second time herself, and about the 5th time someone had contacted Dr Song to say that this girl can't come back another time, and that I just NEEDED to be treated that day. Anyway I guess by then my blood work would have soon been done, so she said if it came back ok (without a pregnancy) that I could go ahead with herceptin.

Guess what? Negative. We went ahead with the treatment which zoomed by and I was all the rage upstairs with nurses buzzing by going, "did she get the go ahead? yes!!". I hugged a lot of people that day.

It was pretty late by the time we were all finished. Not too many people left upstairs. But I still had a standing ovation from my two nurses when I rang that bell. Which this time I was strong enough to do on my own, without Ian's help. And that felt so cool. Here's a nicey nicey picture of me about to ring it followed by me going insane (whoa I'm skinny, yeesh) on the bell. This photo is very embarrassing, but it's real so lets go for it.

So it ended up being a very long but satisfying day. Dinner was delicious and Mom and I got some wine which is always delicious. It was really great to tell the girls that I wasn't going to be sick anymore and that the hospital visits were mostly done. June's the best and kept toasting to me. We told our server what we were celebrating and I guess she told the manager. He came over and opened with "do you come here often" which I thought was hilarious, but when I asked him if he was hitting on me, his eyes just went to my giant husband and he started to blush. Who cares, I'm on top of the world at this point, let's make fun of people! Whatever! whooohoo! Anyway, brosef bought me dessert which was delicious. Well, it would have been a lot more delicious had my children not eaten all the strawberries.

The end.
Ps I'll let you know after Tuesday when I have an appointment with Dr Song (I feel like I've typed her name 14 times so far) and we find out what's going on with me otherwise..... and soon I have to have my port out so there will be more gorey surgery photos to come. I know right?! Your fave!