Monday, January 31, 2011

Chemo 4 and an oopsie

I sucked it up and went to playgroup last Friday, thinking I was being a hero. Of course within 12 hours we were sick. It was just sneezes and congestion, but for me that ends up making me pretty miserable and is way harder on me than the girls.

I go for bloodwork before each chemotherapy to make sure my white cells are high enough to get it again. Well this time, somebody read it wrong and gave me the go ahead when I was under. I know, drama rama once again, right? The phone rang the morning after chemo and it was my nurse with the "bad news" and she said I'd have to start injections, one a day for 7-10 days to get my white cells up. Basically in place of a blood transfusion. The home care nurses came for the last 3 days but after that, I have to do it myself (never gonna happen). Each shot is worth over a thousand bucks! That's insane to me. Oh, and it makes your bones hurt pretty bad, and even worse yet, makes you feel like you've been hit by a mack truck. Bad. I have no energy and can't stand up really. This morning I came down the stairs and had to lay down on the landing for a good 10 minutes before thinking about moving.

I think that's all of my updates.... sorry to cut it off, I'm feeling yucky and can't concentrate too well. I'll write again in a few days and put up a fancy picture or something.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

This one's for Brian

So I guess I haven't written in a while and people (like Brian) want some more.... What do you want to talk about? Christmas? Ok!

It was pretty much the best morning ever, thanks to so many people who were so incredibly generous. Santa dropped stuff off for my girls to other houses and they dropped them all off in time for us to add them under the tree Christmas morning. At one point we had to take a break because the girls got so distracted by what they had already opened, it was crazy!
We had decided 2 years ago to spend Christmas day at home just us 4 (or 5 or 6, whatever it ends up being) and it was truly relaxing and amazing this year. No pressure, we just did our thing, had a nice nap, too. We even had a tea party with my mom's beautiful tea set that my Nannie had given to her, so that was really special to me. Our lovely friend Jen had given the girls their own tea set that they used, cause I sure as hell wasn't going to let them touch mine! Snap!

I took the tree and decorations down on boxing day. I know it sounds crazy, but all December long, you look at that tree and get so excited about its purpose. Then after Christmas day it becomes a part of your 'to do' list, and it's not easy for me to enjoy anymore. I love crossing stuff off lists, so it was very liberating. I was so tired afterwards, but it was so worth it.

Stuff is getting a little trickier these days, since the last round I've become weaker just with day to day stuff. When I told my Nan how easily I get tired or how I need to rest at the top of the stairs, she said it sounded like getting old. What a drag! Also my eyes are very dry and it always feels like there's a little fan sitting in front of my face making them water and get foggy.

My next appointment with my doctor is coming up next week and chemo is the following day, so I'm sure it'll be a little while before I write again. I'll try to think of something better to write about, who wants to read about barf and sleepiness over and over?

I realize now that a lot of people who didn't read before have started to now... so sorry in advance for all the nudity and bellies and boobs. You know me! I was a little too proud when it came to pregnancy and breastfeeding and these pictures will never get old for me. Hi Nannie! Hey Grandpa! Surprise, I love youuu!

Bahaha. Ok here's some photos (no boobs, I swear)

Here's a pic of the tree before:

The snacks the morning after:

And my babies on the stairs: